Sht Happens
by Mali Kollama
Summary: Tweek should probably never be left home alone. -a tale of addictions, gender bending, ups and downs, threesome het/homo adventures, and teenage delinquency -CraigxKennyxTweek
1. Chapter 1

**A/N This is fucked up. Gender bending, boy on boy, threesome het/homo. I don't even know. If you don't like fucked up situations and all this messed up shit straight from the depths of my hormone induced mind, then don't read this. Don't bother flaming, I'll just ignore it. I don't expect very many views, or comments, on this. I just need to get it out there. And I know there are some of you fangirls out there that could appreciate this.** **Oh, and I've never written sex scenes before, so hopefully this is decent.**

**CraigxKennyxTweek**

**Disclaimer:** **I DON'T WON SOUTH PARK.

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Shit Happens.

Chapter 1

It seemed like a good idea. I really, really did. But now, it's too late. There's no turning back.

It all began when I was home alone (first sign of a bad idea, I should never be left alone), and I was nervously sipping on a cup of coffee at 4 in the morning. My boyfriends are at work, leaving me to mindlessly watch some infomercials. I was about to turn off the television after a half hour of listening to some peppy blonde girl talk about some new electric can opener. I was about to turn off the television, but something caught my attention.

A new drug. A new drug that is in testing, and needs guinea pigs. They're pills for anxiety patients with Attention Deficit Disorder. How many people fucking suffer from BOTH of those? Well, I suppose it made sense the infomercial was on at FOUR in the fucking MORNING. It spoke to me. I've tried everything, nothing has ever cured me of my insanity. Who would I have been to question a magic pill like that?

One simple phone call. I made one simple phone call, and I was on the list. To my surprise, the pill arrived the next day. Luckily my boyfriends work until 5 am, and sleep until 3 in the afternoon. The package arrived at noon, and I was quick to begin experimenting.

Why didn't I read the warnings? Not that the warnings could ever have predicted THIS. Raised estrogen levels, yes. I was expecting that. Turning me into a girl? I never saw it coming.

Now, I am here. In our apartments bathroom, staring my naked self down in the mirror, staring at my ridiculously morphed body. I was always girly looking, sure, but it was never THIS bad!

My pale face is softer. My already huge green eyes even _larger_, surrounded by long think blonde eyelashes. My Adams apple is non-existent.

My vision ventures downward. Jesus. The worst part. BOOBS. Oh dear god. Sticking out of my obvious ribs are two, huge damn double D's.

What.

The.

FUCK.

Okay, sure, I was pretty _big_ for such a little guy, but if this is the female equivalent I want NO part in it. Oh, yeah, and my dick. I have no fucking clue what happened there. In short- it's gone.

Yup. It is officially too late. I'm a chick.

FUCK.

"Tweek?" A groggy monotone voice cuts through my thoughts. The doorknob jiggles, and I frantically grab my shirt and tug it over my head. "Tweek, why is the door locked?" My boyfriend asks more bored than concerned.

"Just a sec, Craig!" I shout, while trying to pull on my baggy shirt over my head. On the plus side of everything, I no longer have anxiety and ADD. I quickly open the door to find my taller, dark haired, boyfriend clad only in Red Racer boxers. We're 18. You'd think he would have grown out of his childish fad by now.

"Hm." He scratches his stubbly chin before entering the room to take a piss. God, he's such a guy. Why doesn't he ever close the god damn door?

**~X~**

"AHH!" I scream in my high pitched girly voice. FUCK THIS HURTS! My abdomen fucking KILLS! I curl myself tighter as I roll around on my bedroom floor. My boyfriends are at work now, so they'll never hear me. They don't even know this is happening. It's only been a week. A WEEK!

My boyfriends work at the bar from 11pm- 6am every night. Their night classes go from 5pm-10pm, and they sleep all morning. I never sleep. My classes run from 9-11, and 1-4. Basically, we never see each other. Except on Tuesdays. I am SO not looking forward to Tuesday.

I roll around in fetal position every night. My insides are changing. This happens for about three hours after I take a pill. I need to keep taking them. If I stop, I'll be seriously fucked, _and_ fucked up.

**~X~**

So, Tuesday afternoon has rolled around. I'm pretty sure I have never cried more, than this past week. I probably should have gone to a doctor, but I hate doctors. They scare the shit out of me. Simple as that.

"I love Tuesdays! I finally get to see my little Tweeky-Tweekers!" Kenny grabs my face and gives me a hard kiss to my lips. "Awe, I love you, babe!"

"You guys want pizza, or Chinese tonight?" Craig asks after grabbing the phone in our kitchen area.

"Hm, personally I'm feelin' a nice meat lovers. How bout you, Tweekers?"

"Hm? Um, yeah, sure." I nervously rub my arm. My huge baggy sweatshirt that actually belongs to Craig, somewhat easily hide my hug ta-ta's underneath.

"You okay, Tweeky?" My taller blond boyfriend takes a step towards me. I quickly jerk back, without thinking.

"Tweek, you look…"

"Different." Craig deadpans as he makes his way closer to me. My huge eyes dart between them. I need to tell them. NOW.

"I need to talk to you guys about something…" I mumble, without stutter. I don't shake anymore like I used to either.

"Tweek, I know we're never around with you, babe, but… there's something _different…_"

"I… I know. I've decided to be a guinea pig for this new drug that cures anxiety, and ADD. Unfortunately… it kinda… turned me into a girl." I tell them with my newly acquired soft feminine voice.

The looks on their faces right now, is probably _the most_ terrifying thing I have ever seen. The glance over to each other, then quickly back to me.

"A _girl?_" to be honest, Kenny looks like a kid in a candy store. "With _boobs_?" I nod my head slowly. My head drops and my hands reach to the bottom of Craig's hoodie. I quickly pull it over my head, exposing my bare chest. Both Kenny's, and Craig's jaws need to be picked up off the floor by now.

"Please, please don't hate me…" Tears begin to sting my eyes. My palms fly up to hide my face, as the tears trickle through my girly fingers.

"Hate you? We could _never_ hate you, Tweekers." Kenny calmly pulls my wrists from my feminine face. His expression is soft, and his eyes; understanding, and calm. His hands slip down my bare sides to hold my slender hips. His warm lips softly press to mine for a moment.

"Y-you don't hate me?" His hands move to cup my face. As he smiles. His thumbs wipe away my tears and he mouths 'No'.

"Tweek, I'm bi, Craig's a pan, and you were gay! We love you no matter what gender, and now you're technically straight!"

"Kenny, this is serious." Craig pulls our boyfriends shoulder back so he can see me as well. "Tweek got a week long sex change, and he probably has to _keep _taking these pills, or he's totally screwed."

"Hm… screw…" A cheeky grin moves to the blond's face. I am in no shape to have anyone fuck me right now, Jesus!

"Kenny, this is serious. Stop thinking with your dick."

"Booooobs…" Kenny grabs both of my breasts in his hands and squeezes a few times. Holy fuck I'm probably blushing so hard right now. Craig stress at him, completely unamused.

"Kenny. Do remember this is _Tweek._"

"Dude, Tweek was like 9 inches. No shit he's got tits this big!"

"Um…" I attempt to bring attention to the fact that his hands are _still_ on me.

"God, you're so fucking hot."

"Tweek, are you okay?"

"To be honest, my biggest concern was that you guys would hate me. I scratch the back of my head awkwardly before forcefully removing Kenny's hands. He pouts and whines when I pull Craig's hoodie back over my head.

"Tweek, like Kenny said, we could never hate you. We love you too much. No matter what gender." Craig pulls me into a tight hug, squishing myself against him. Ugh, I hope I can get used to that feeling. Awe, I don't get to be as close to him anymore!

"I love you guys, too."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Here's the first sex scene. **

**It's a multichip, and Kenny's a sex addict. Put two and two together; there's bound to be tons more smut. **

**Alright, here ya go.**

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Chapter 2

"I guess we need to go clothes shopping." Craig sighs as he flops back on the couch to my right, full from devouring half a pizza.

"We should totally get her some sexy lingerie!" Kenny exclaims excitedly from my left. "And skimpy outfits!"

"Kenny, I'm not a god damn whore! I'm not walking around campus in slutty outfits!"

"Just one?" He looks so happy. How could I ever say no to those huge blue orbs?

"Fine."

"You probably shouldn't have agreed to that." Craig states.

"There's a lot of things I probably should have not done. Like give up my dick to be sane." Craig shrugs. Wow, it's amazing how much happier they both are now that I'm a girl!

"Shall we take a look at that? Ya know, see what's goin' on down there?" Kenny suggests calmly. The blond's hand laces with mine. He pulls me from the couch to our bedroom, Craig follows. My brunette takes a seat, cross legged, on our queen sized bed we all are supposed to share. Most nights I just end up on the couch.

I lay myself on the bed, my head in Craig's lap, our hands intertwine tightly. I'm kinda scared right now. I was trying my best to ignore this part. Kenny unbuckles my jeans and pulls them down to my knees, followed by my boxers. A smile forms on his face.

"Fuck, I haven't seen a pussy in, what? Four years? Dayum, dude." He holds my legs as his head moves closer to my crotch. "Hm, it all looks good down here. Fuck, I can't imagine where your cock went." Before I can respond I suddenly feel his wet, slimy tongue move in and around my entrance. Holy fuck. Oh, sweet Jesus! My eyes widen, and my lips part, as I stare up at Craig. My breathing heavies, and my hands clench tighter to Craig's at the touch of Kenny's tongue on, and in me. I bite my lip and buck my hips as he eats me out. Fuck, he may be out of practice, but he is damn good at this.

After a moment of his tongue swirling around, my toes curl and I can feel my breathing hitch as I cum on his mouth. My head falls back into Craig's lap and I finally loosen my grip of the brunettes' hands. He cups my face and rubs my cheek with his thumb as to comfort me.

"Well, looks like everything's working just fine down there!" Kenny wipes his mouth with his forearm and chuckles a little. "You fucking her tonight, Craig?" Them talking about me like I'm just a doll honestly doesn't bother me. Never has, probably never will. I love and trust these two with my life.

"Yup." I can already feel his erection on the back of my head, aroused from the show as just displayed. Kenny pulls me up and gives me a light kiss to my cheek before pulling off my shirt.

I gotta say, once a guy has a threesome, there is no going back. It's never the same with two people after that. Where two people usually make a whole, the three of us do the same. Without one of us, we just aren't… complete.

Kenny's mouth moves to my chest to suck on my breast, which is actually a lot more satisfying then I would have thought. Craig wraps his arms around my waist from behind me. I turn my head and we begin to suck face and shoves our tongues down each others throats forcefully. Kenny pulls off my pants completely and moves off to the side to undress himself. One of Craig's hands move down between my legs to rub gently. We break apart and I turn myself around to undress him.

I'm naked, they should be, too. My only rule.

I pull down his pants and boxers to rub his balls. Suddenly I feel a few of his cold fingers slip into my new entrance and begin to scissor. I moan loudly at the foreigner touch.

"Craig, you already got to take Tweek's virginity! Can't I do the front, please, babe?"

"Mmm, fine." His fingers slip out and both of them turn me around. Craig grabs some lube from his side table and dresses himself up. He spreads my cheeks and the familiar feeling of his cock entering my hole sends a shiver down my spine. Kenny shuffles closer to me on his knees. His lanky arms wrap around me and he gently slides himself into my new hole. Craig easily slips his full length into my backside. Kenny, on the other hand, takes his time. I'm fucking tight, man.

I grit my teeth and scream as he slips his erection further, and further, inside. After a few moments on slight uncomfortable struggle, both begin to pump slowly. Their penetration quickly picks up speed, and I continue to scream their names. My fingernails dig deep into Kenny's shoulders. Craig arrives first, thought continues to pump until Kenny arrives as well. Both are so kind to wait until I reach orgasm a moment later. I moan and tilt my head back in ecstasy.

I fucking love Tuesdays.

Both slip out of me slowly as we all fall back on our bed, sweaty and exhausted. Craig pulls out a pack of smokes from the night table, and we all light up. I only smoke after sex, and when I drink. Coffee is my only one true addiction.

Actually, we all have our addictions. Mine being coffee, Kenny's is obviously sex, and Craig smokes. We're all heading for early death, but who cares. We'd be lost without each other anyway.

My boys have both since finished their cancer sticks and we are now all wrapped up, naked, with each other. After sex is the only real way I sleep. I'll just take my ADD pill as soon as I wake up. I wouldn't want to ruin this high now, anyway.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N This chapter is a little more fluffy. **

**Thanks for reading it guys**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything but these words. No products, or stores mentioned, nor South Park.**

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Chapter 3

Ugh… My stomach... Fuck. Oh, my god.

"Erghh!" I begin to moan involuntarily. My body begins to curl. Ow… Why do I hurt so fucking much? Oh, right, I'm becoming a woman. Wonderful. Oh shit.

"AHH!" I scream out. Fuck that hurt. It was like a shooting pain right under my stomach. By now Craig and Kenny have sprung up, now wide awake, trying to comfort me.

"Christ, Tweek, are you alright, dude?' Kenny grabs my shoulder with one hand, and my face with the other. I shake my head no. My teeth clench as another piece of pain shoots down my back.

"Fuck, does this happen all the time? You're sure handling it well." Craig inquires, not touching me because he knows it won't do me any good anyway.

"Ergh! My insides are changing. It doesn't help that you both fucked me last night." I don't mean that as if I'm mad, cause I'm not, and I don't blame them for any of this. They know that. I love how we all just _know_ what each other is thinking.

"Probably not." My brunette deadpans before getting out of bed. Kenny pulls me close on to his lap, my head at his chest. Kenny is very… touchy feely. Craig, not so much. Another reason I need both of them to feel whole.

"Is there anything we can do, Tweek? I know you're not about to go to the hospital, even though you _really_ should. Hey, ken, you got any oxy's or T3's on you?"

"Mmm, yes! All my drugs are in the top left cupboard in the bathroom." The tall brunette pulls on his Red Racer boxers to take off to the washroom.

They're quite a dangerous duo. Kenny, practical and always ready with all his crazy shit, and Craig just _knows_ shit. He's just intuitive and intelligent. It's dangerous!

"AHH!" I screech. Kenny's lanky arms pull me closer to his chest. I just hope I can walk today. There's no fucking way I'm going to class though. There's another lecture Friday, it's fine.

"Here." Craig renters the room with a T3 and a glass of water. I swallow quickly. God, I hope this works.

"I need my pill. Craig, could you get it for me?" I ask softly. I must look like shit right now. My brunette nods and returns a moment later.

"We need to go shopping today. If we don't do it today, we'd have to wait until next week." My dark haired boy tells us after entering the room.

"Will you be up for it, Tweekers?" My blond holding me asks calmly. God, they're both so calm and patient. That's the only way they could possibly deal with me in all my insanity.

"I think I can do that."

**~X~**

Thank God the pain killers worked. I'm a little drowsy, but that's okay. Ugh. I hate boobs. They're heaavvvyyyy. My boyfriends are holding both of my hands while we walk through the Denver mall.

"Arlight, so, you need a bra. Then you need new outfits. I was saving up for a new car or something, but you certainly rate higher than practical transportation, Tweekers." Kenny pulls us both off into the direction of Victoria Secret. I know deep down that this place is really expensive, but did I mention Kenny is a drug dealer on the side of their actual job? Just for extra cash. He likes to spoil us.

"Ken, shouldn't we get like practical clothes for her?"

"Duh, but come on man! Sure I loved having two boyfriends, but now I finally get to go lingerie shopping! For a girl!" He has that 'kid in a candy store' look on his face again. He basically skips his way to the side of the store where all the pretty lacy things are. I can't help but giggle. There's lot'sa colours.

"Tweek, you okay?" Craig places a hand on my slim shoulder.

"Mhm!" I smile sweetly up to him. "You gotta nice face." I giggle again as I glide my feminine hand down his cheek. My brunette smirks and rolls his eyes.

"All right! So, I got this one, this one, annnd this one!" My blond happily holds up a pink, green, then lacy blue undergarments.

"Well that was fast." Craig deadpans. Kenny skips over to me and shoves the lingerie into my arms.

"Go try it on!" My blond tells me hopefully.

"Okaaayyy!" I turn on my heal and make my way to the change rooms. Hm. I seem to have forgotten, in my current influenced state, that I actually have no idea how to use a bra. I'm gay, well I was. Point being, I've never actually needed to touch them.

I slide off Craig's large black MSI hoddie. Okay, this can't be _that_ hard, right? I mean, girls put them on every day! Okay so hooking it in the back doesn't work... I can't see it… So if I turn it around and… THERE!

"Success!" I whisper loudly. My arms slide through the blue straps and turn to face the mirror only to find some strange blonde girl in a pink bra.

I… I just… I don't look like _me_ anymore…

"Craig? Kenny?" I ask out in my girlish voice.

"Yeah, Tweek?" Craig's flat voice answers from the other side of the door.

"Do I come out, or do you come in?"

"I'll come in if you want, Tweekers." I unhook the door and move to the side so no people can see. I lock the door again and finally turn to face my tall boyfriend. I find his mouth is agape, and there's an obvious blush on his face.

"Um, looks good, Tweek…" He rubs his neck awkwardly.

"Okay…" I mumble. I can feel my face heat when I begin to unhook it. I grab the next one, and take notice Craig. He's trying not to look at me. Is that to be polite, or does he not like what he sees? Fuck, I hate it when I can't tell what he's thinking!

"Something wrong?" I pull the green straps over my shoulder and adjust the undergarment. His grey eyes look directly into mine. That's the biggest difference between Craig, and Kenny right now. Kenny looks at my boobs, Craig looks at my face.

"I like that one. Brings out your eyes." He sends me a half smile as to show he's being genuine. He's so cute.

"Thanks… Hey, Craig?"

"Hm?"

"How are you, um, handling this whole thing?" I switch into the poka-dotted bra.

"Do you know what I contemplated when I first found out I was in love with you, Tweek?" I look back up to his expressionless face.

"W-what?"

"Nothing." Awe! A smile creeps to my lips. His hands cup my soft face. "I fell in love with _you_, not your dick. I love you anyway you are. Insane, sane, girl, or boy; you're still Tweek, and I'll always love you."

"That is the sweetest thing you've ever said to me." His cute smile spreads his lips before he kisses mine gently. "So, why are you so nervous?"

"I-"

"Tweekers!" Kenny's voice interjects.

"In here, Kenny!" He throws a few practical bras over the door.

"Hey, where's Craig?"

"I'm in here."

"Oulala! Well don't be too long lovebirds!" Craig flips off the door. "Craig, stop flipping me off." We all chuckle. "So, do _I_ get to see?" I quickly switch into the pink one and open the door to show my blond.

"Dayum! I guess we should start thinking about getting you a job at the bar, huh? I roll my eyes and slam the door on him.

Did I mention _which_ bar my boyfriends work at? They're bartenders at a strip club. And it's not one of those cheap ones, no. _This_ strip club is for the _expensive_ crowd. It's fucking high end, and you know what that means. MONEY, and lot's of it.

We purchase the undergarments and make our way to a few clothing stores. Fuck, it is so much better with a little help holding up these ridiculous pieces of flesh. Kenny pulls us off in the direction H&M.

"Why do you like shopping so much, Ken?" I ask wearily.

"Probably cause I never got to when I was a kid. Being poor fucking sucked. Ou! This is nice!" He passes me a grey V-neck. This shows an awful lot of cleave.

After buying a few new outfits we make our way to the food court.

Surprisingly, I'm hungry. I'm like _never_ hungry! I'm currently wearing that grey v-neck, a nice pair of skinnies, black flats, and a black cardigan. Oh, and a little grey headband with a bow that Kenny thought would be really cute. I guess it's not _that _bad being a girl, right?

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**A/N Review if you want. It's nice to have feedback I guess.**

**Oh, and I'll start working on We Go Good Together blah blah blah again once I've gotten this out of my system. **

**I dunno. Writting Creek just feels like there's something missing. Oh I know! KENNY! :P My fav lil sex addict (heart)**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Annnd the story continues. To those who have read this far, sorry bout the wait. I was away all weekend kicking ass at a competition. The next chapter will be quick probably. **

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Chapter 4

The three of us take our seat at a circular food court table. A few moments into enjoying my DQ Blizzard, a familiar voice catches our attentions.

"Hey! Kenny!" We all turn to see Stan, and his best friend Kyle, making their ways toward us.

"Hey, guys!" My blond responds. To him, the more people around, the better. I can't say Craig and I agree to that, but it's fine.

"Hey, Craig." Kyle greets my brunette, who in turn gives them a death glare. I'm trying my best to hide myself right now. I probably look like an idiot. Out of the corner of my eye I can see everyone looking at me. Ugh, this is a lot of pressure!

"Tweek?" Craig squeezes my thigh to get my attention after Stan addresses me. I look over nervously to give Kenny's friends a nervous grin. I probably look so dumb right now.

"Tweek? Dude! When did you get a sex change, dude?" Kyle asks freaked out a bit. Ugh! I hate dealing with people! Damn T3 wearing off. Now I'm actually aware of what's going on!

"It's kind of a long story. Can you leave her alone?" Craig defends me with a slight bit of anger laced in his usually flat tone. I know he means well.

"Be nice Craigy-boo." My brunette flips off my blond. Fuck, I just want to go home. "It is a long story though, guys. It wasn't intentional, but isn't she beautiful?" Kenny brushes my soft cheek lightly.

"Um I gotta get back to Wendy… You coming, Ky?" The ginger nods. They both rush off awkwardly.

"Your friends are dicks, Ken." Craig states flatly.

"Oh, but you now I like dicks." Kenny winks over to my brunette before standing. I grab my yummy ice cream, and we take off.

**~X~**

Stats class is honestly the most boring class ever. Fuck, it sucks. Why am I even taking it? Ah, yes, I used to like numbers when I was under 'so much pressure'. Cause numbers are solid, and they make sense… Or some shit like that. Well, now, I hate it.

No one on campus has even noticed I've changed. Not that I would ever expect them to. I never talk to anyone. I don't do the whole 'people thing'. That, and I wear really baggy clothes, so I don't attract any unwanted attention to myself.

"Uph!" Some guy knocks my shoulder and I stumble to the wall. A normal occurrence for someone who is practically invisible in these hallways; girl, or boy. It's cool. I have two loving boyfriends who would do anything and everything for me and love me no matter what. I don't need any of these assholes. I make my way across the cold, damp campus to the bus stop to go home.

My keys fumble in my unsteady hands, and I enter our small coffee smelling apartment. Mmmm… Coffee…

"Fuck! CRAIG!" I hear a pleasure induced scream from our bedroom. My boyfriends often fuck when I'm not here. Kenny practically _needs_ to every day, and since I'm never home when they are, it's usually just the two of them.

I walk over to the bedroom door and lean against the frame. Kenny's topping this time from behind. Nice. Craig Tucker, and Kenny McCormick; two of the hottest guys in Colarado, banging right in front of me. Truly an honor to witness.

They finish at pretty much the same time, and Kenny rolls off of my brunette, who flips over; wincing at the pain in his ass.

"Oh, hey, Tweekers! How long you been standing there?" I suddenly jump and begin to blush. Ugh! I'm so awkward!

"Um… uh.. Coffee!" I stumble away to the kitchen. Mmmm I needed some of this.

"Tweek, what would you like for dinner, babe?" Kenny warps his arms around my waist. When I turn to face him, I find him naked, and sweaty. A part of me actually thinks this is _really_ attractive. Hm. I guess I'm only human.

"Do you guys want some tacos? I think we have all the stuff here. I can have them done before you two have to leave."

"Awe, you're such a perfect little house wife!" My blond nuzzles his nose on mine. House wife? Is _that_ what I am now? Well I was too before, but now at least I have to boobs to play the part. Speaking of which, Kennys' hands are now traveling up under my shirt, under my bra, to get a feel. The perv _just_ had sex, and he still does this stuff. Typical.

**~X~**

'Thirteen Reasons Why'. Never thought I'd be into books like this. Usually I read comics. Suddenly the squeak of our bedroom door rips me from the depressed ratings of my preteen novel.

"Tweek, are you busy?" Craig steps into the room, knowing my answer already is no.

"Uh-uh. What's up, Craig?" Sometimes, when it's quiet, I forget how high and soft my voice is now.

"Um, I was wondering if we could have some alone time." He makes his way closer to our bed.

"Of-course." I reluctantly close my book, and set it on our side table. When I turn back, Craig's hand runs itself through my long-ish messy blonde hair. His charcoal eyes are the only things that give away his emotions; at the moment, they're drenched with lust. He moves close, and his lips meet mine to kiss tenderly.

"I just kinda thought I should let you know that I love you." His nasally voice states calmly, and he shrugs. Despite his cold exterior, Craig is honestly one of the sweetest guys on this planet.

I smile up to him. "I love you too, Craig." His hands grip my sides as mine wrap around his neck, and I slide under him. His lips meet mine again hungrily, and his hands calmly unbuckle my jeans. He's always just so calm, in every situation. It's astounding, really.

Once he's pulled my jeans down, he easily pulls his down as well. Our lips break, and he pulls down my panties we bought a few weeks ago. He slides his boxers down and I spread my legs for him. He looks up to me, his dark grey eyes meeting mine. His eyes give me a look as if to say 'Are you okay?'.

His hand moves from my side and takes hold of my small hand that is at his back. Gripping it tightly, I nod and he slides into me; our gaze never breaking. It's still a bit uncomfortable, but Craig is gentle. He moves in and out of me slowly. He never breaks our stare. I bite my lip when he hits a sweet spot. He takes the hint and continues to push the same way. My breathing heavies, and the grip I have on my lip tightens.

A few harder thrusts, and Craig arrives inside of me. The weird, unfamiliar feeling sends a shiver up my spine. His sweet lips meet mine again before he pulls out slowly. He pulls my pants up, before standing to fix himself as well. What a gentleman.

Well, I didn't have an orgasm this time. Hm. That kind of sucks. Now I know what those shows mean when they say women usually fake it.

"Dude, you gotta make her scream!" Kenny announces to my brunette after he leaves the room.

"Fucking peoples brains out isn't _always_ the way to go, Ken." Craig remarks before the sound of a beer-can can heard opening. He's right though. Sometimes I like to walk after having sex.

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**A/N Review if you'd like. Feedback's cool. **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N Rumanya you smart cookie! ;D**

**This chapter is short to leave you with a cliffhanger, and a longer next chapter. **

**Oh, and for this entire story, I own nothing but these words.

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Chapter 5

With my pack on my shoulder, I take off out of class into the crowded hallway. After being a girl for nearly three months, I'm finally starting to actually get used to it. People actually don't push you in the hallway as much I have found.

Hm. I'm hungry. I guess I could stop by the grocery store. Our fridge has been looking rather empty anyway. I've actually been eating quite a bit lately. Coffee used to satisfy me alone, but lately I've actually had a _real_ appetite. It's probably from my pill. That makes sense.

Popping a new piece of mint gun into my mouth I enter the superstore a few streets away from DU. I've been eating a shit load of this lately. I dunno, it just tastes really good, and I always want it.

"Oh my God, Stacey! You have enough Oreos in there?" I glance over to see a few other girls shopping with each other. The brunette, Stacey, has like 8 packs of vanilla Oreos in her cart.

"Oh shut up, April! I've just been having a craving for them!" Craving? Like a short-term addiction kind of thing?

"Shit, girl! You pregnant or something, Stace? You've been eating those non-stop for like a month!"

What…

Wait…

Cravings… Eating… Weight gain… I thought it was from the pill…

Oh. Oh, shit.

I look down to my basket, which is mostly full of peppermint chocolate snack cakes, peppermint gum, and mint Aeros. My hand subconsciously moves to my belly, which I hidden under one of Kenny's pink hoodies (the boy rocks bright colours). Fuck, this is NOT good.

**~X~**

The light from the TV illuminates my face. Obviously it's on, but I stopped paying attention to it hours ago.

What if I really am pregnant? How could I be? I mean, I haven't had like a period, or whatever, so how do I know my girl organs even work?

Kenny, and Craig are at work now. For the first time in a long time, I actually don't even really want to see them…

Ugh. I need to get to the hospital this weekend. No matter how much I hate them, I need to go. Come on, Tweek. You need to suck it up, and go see the doctor. No matter how many scary needles he has, you NEED to go.

Suddenly the pain I feel regularly after I take my pill every night stabs my gut. My hands wrap tight around my stomach as I fall to my side on the couch. What if the pain really _isn't_ just from the pill?

**~X~**

"Tweek… Tweak?" A nurse calls out my stupid name into the waiting room, breaking me from my attempt to ignore the frightening people around me. I scurry to her and follow her down the hall. I feel my eyes dart around, taking in my surroundings carefully. I hate hospitals. They smell funny. And the people are scary. And there are so many GERMS! Gah!

"Right in here, ma'me." I am not a 'ma'me'. Oh, wait, yes I am. Bleh. "The doctor will be with you in a moment." Hm, I guess she's not _that_ scary.

My eyes dart around again. The room is full of needles, and charts, and giant toothpicks… What the fuck?

"Mr. Tweak, is it?" The doctor enters with a file in hand. Ugh, I hate how they can just keep information like that! I've been here before, for an anxiety attack about five years ago. Scary shit, man!

"`Miss' now." The doctor looks up at me, shocked at my feminine voice.

"Miss?" His jaw drops a little.

"Yes, that's actually why I'm here… Um… I took an in testing medication to cure my A.D.D., and anxiety, and now I'm a girl." The grey-haired man stares at me, perplexed.

"The pill gave you a sex change?" So blunt.

"Yes. But at least I'm calm now." I shrug.

"This is really serious Miss. Tweak! That drug could have possibly killed you!" Comforting. I get the doctor with anxiety. Woo-hoo.

"Yes, but it didn't. Actually, I think I might be… Pregnant…" I trail off while pulling at my sleeves.

"Oh. Well, we need to run some tests on you then, Miss. Tweak."

The rest of my afternoon is spent having cold metal things, and fingers, among other things shoved up my crotch, blood tests, urine tests, and tons of scans. Fun stuff.

"Miss. Tweek, we have some devastating news for you." The doctor re-enters my room with a chart. It's not even 'possibly devastating', stating he knows for a fact that anyone in this situation would cry. Just my luck.


	6. Chapter 5 and a half

**A/N This, and the previous chapter together would have been long enough for a 'real' chapter, so I consider this 5 1/2.**

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Chapter 5 1/2

"Miss. Tweak, you were right. You are pregnant."

I think I actually just heart my heart shatter.

"Unfortunately though, the baby isn't developing properly, the pregnancy _must_ be aborted." I can feel the tears begin to well up as I nod my head in understanding.

Fuck you and all your fucking straight-forwardness you son of a bitch!

"Alright." I whisper. I stand in my hospital gown and follow the man out of the room.

"Hey, Doc?" I ask the man timidly as we walk down to the O.R.

"Yes, Miss?"

"What would happen if I stopped taking my pills?"

"Well, that would be bad." Thanks genius. I already knew that. "Your body is now dependent on the drug. I'll be sending you home with estrogen pills, among others, to help your body create hormones that men do not make a whole lot of. It'll be okay." …That didn't sound very convincing.

**~X~**

Fuck. This is the most pain I have EVER been in. Forget changing into a girl, that surgery fucking KILLED. I don't even know if Kenny, and Craig are home. I can't remember their classes right now; that's the least of my fucking problems. I don't know what I'm going to do. This is _the most_ pissed off, angry, scared, and confused I have ever been.

Slowly but surly I've made my way to our apartment door. I'm pumped full of pain killers, and hormones. Marvelous.

I enter the apartment to see my boyfriends on the couch; Kenny is lying his head on Craig's lap. Suddenly my body goes on auto pilot. I think I just snapped.

I hear the door slam behind me.

"Tweek? Where you been?" Both of my boys look over to me from the couch.

"Where have I been? I've fucking been at the fucking hospital is where I've been!" Both stand quickly, and cautiously take a few steps towards me.

"The hospital?" Craig asks, stunned.

"YES, the fucking hospital, fucking aborting your fucked up kid!" I hear myself yell to them at the top of my lungs. Both stop dead in their tracks, and their faces turn to each other. They look so stupid when they're stunned.

"Tw-" Kenny begins.

"FUCK! OFF!" I pull the hospital bills from my pocket, crumple them, and throw the large ball of paper over to them. My feet stomp off to our room. I leave the door open a small crack. Finally I take control of my body again when my back hits the wall beside the door. I slide to the floor as the tears flow without mercy.

"Holy fuck." Craig gasps from the living room.

"I don't think I've ever seen Tweek pissed off before…" Kenny gasps. I glance out the small crack to see Craig pick up the balled up papers. Kenny's eyes widen, and his hand flied to cover his mouth wide open from shock.

"He has every right to be." I force myself to look away. Pulling my knees to my chest, my head falls as I continue to weep. I don't hate them, I love them. I love them so fucking much. I'm just scared.

"Tweek?" My brunettes low voice addresses me softly just after creaking our door open.

"Tweek, babe, please come talk to us." Kenny kneels in front of me.

"Ngh! NO! Not until you two decide to wear a fucking condom!" I scream out to my legs. I finally move my head to glare at the blond.

"Woah-woah! Easy with the c-word, dude!" Kennys' arms fly up in surrender.

"We haven't used condoms in years!" Craig pulls him up from the ground. Glaring at the blond, my brunette punches our boyfriend's shoulder.

"Don't be an insensitive asshole. None of us are fucking ready to have a kid. Imagine how much pain Tweek is in right now." Craig scolds in the logical way that Kenny and I both know we need to hear.

"I know this is just as much my fault, but that's not the point right now. We need to talk this out like fucking adults." My brunette pulls my tiny body up easily. Both of my boys pull me close. I love when they hug me. Their embraces make me feel so safe… It's like all of my problems disappear.

"Tweekers, we're sorry." My blond wipes the fallen droplets from my warm cheeks. "Please forgive us?" I can't help but smile at how cute he looks right now. His pale face framed by loose strands of his soft dirty blond hair. His cheeky smile completing it all.

I sigh. "Of course I forgive you." I whisper up to them. My voice is hoarse from screaming my lungs out.

"We need to figure out how to pay for all this." My logical brunette states calm, and cool as always. Hm. Our next dilemma.

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**A/N Again, if you'd bothered to read this far, I really don't mind hearing from you. **


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N And I have finally figured out how I'm going to continue this story. I kept getting stuck, then had an epiphany whilst half asleep. Hazza!**

**I do not own anything but these words. (Plagiarism is a crime! :P)

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Chapter 6

"It's about fucking time you paid me back, Marsh." Since a football incident that wrecked the kids knees, Stan now has a sort of _on the side_ addiction to pain killers. Nothing serious, or else I wouldn't sell them to him, since he _is _ a friend after all.

"You know I always pay you back, dude. Wendy just decided to send five hundred bucks out of no where to the needy children of South Africa or something." The brunette hands me a wad of cash, as I exchange him Perks.

"Pfft. Women." I chuckle. Fuck, now he's going to mention Tweek.

"Speaking of which, dude-"

"Stan! Stan, there you are!" Wendy and all her high-pitched voiceness makes her way to us from across the campus garden thingy, saving me from an explanation.

"See ya, Ken." I bob my head and make my way to His business class to pick Him up. I don't like spending time away from Him. Business is the only class He has, that I don't.

"Craig!" I smile and wave to Him like an idiot. He hates when I do that.

"Put you're hand down, idiot." He walks past me.

"Missed you, too." I follow close beside Him as we make our ways home.

"Where's Tweek?" I ask when we enter our apartment. Ahh… I love our sofa. My ass makes itself comfortable while I watch Him.

"Another doctors appointment. You have to go pick her up in… 42 minutes." He tells me while rummaging around the kitchen. My amazing bartender is actually also an amazing cook, which is awesome. All those years he spent at home doing boring stuff, rather than being out with me, and my friends being retarded; he learned boring stuff, like how to cook.

"Will do. You coming too?"

"Sure." I decide to get up and walk to my sexy boy.

"Whatcha makin'?" My skinny arms wrap around His waist.

"Sammiches." He smirks and glances over to my face. His dark grey eyes meet mine. "I love you." Well that was out of no where. He always says it out of no where. But He only says it when He really means it.

"I love you, too." I lean my head onto His shoulder as He continues to slice tomatoes. Ah, I love my life.

"Angel, shall we get going?" I ask Him after we've finished our delicious sammiches.

"Yes. He told us to be there for 8."

**~X~**

"Hey, Tweekers." What a gorgeous little blonde. Her anxiety may be gone, but She's still always so nervous. So cute! He and I take hold of Her hands as we begin our way home.

"They gave me more pills." She announces softly while we make our way up the apartment steps. Her large green eyes glance up to me for a moment before darting away again.

"You have five now, right?" He asks, and She nods when we reenter our apparent.

"We have to get going, Ken. Goodnight, Tweek." Craig and I both give Her a swift kiss to the cheek before taking off to work. Shit, we're gonna be late. MOM hates it when we're late.

**~X~**

"You'r-"

"Late. We know." Craig interjects before MOM can finish.

"Well don't you look lovely today!" I tell the short casually dressed brunette. Her hair is always tied back in a tight pony tail, and I don't think I've ever seen her without her little square glasses on. This woman is all business, which is the way it should be.

"MOM, where's Jeddah?" Lexy, our resident smexy strawberry blonde, asks our boss.

"I saw her car in the parking lot Jeddah. She's here." Craig tells the girl before we leave to get the bar set up.

About half an hour later the regular crowd starts to show, and finally the ladies begin to do their jobs. I'm here long enough that quick glances of all the boobs always satisfy. Mm! Yay titties!

**~X~**

"About fucking time we're done." Craig pours himself a glass of water.

"Yeah don't Saturdays always feel like they un longer than any other day?" My brunette nods. While he wipes down the metal bar and glasses, I wipe down the tall stainless steel tables. It's supposed to look cool and sophisticated or some shit in here. I don't even know. A boob's a boob, and a puppy's a pussy. Rich guy's egos are just too fucking massive that they care what kind of chair they're getting a lap dance at.

"How much did we get in tips tonight, angel?" I ask Him just as we're about to leave.

"Kenneth, do you have anything on you that I could buy at the moment?" MOM interrupts Him quickly.

"Hm, actually I do." I pull out my emergency blow from an inside pocket of my jacket. Hey, never know when I'm gonna make some cash. "You never cease to amaze me MOM." I exchange her for a Ben with a smirk.

"I'm not the Manager Of Miscreants for nothing, Kenneth." With that, the business woman swiftly returns to her office. Another reason I love this job; my boss is hilarious.

"We made $431.50 in tips tonight." Craig states as if the transaction didn't even occur. Ah, I love money. Sweet, sweet cash. He lights up as we leave the building.

When we make our way into our apartment I notice Her on the sofa laying peacefully asleep. That's odd. Hm. I wonder if it has anything to do with Her new pills.

"The doctor gave her sleeping pills." Craig clicks the television off, and places a blanket over the blondes thin body. She's so beautiful.

We make our ways to the bedroom where He begins to undress himself out of his work clothes.

"I can help you with that, angel." I purr into His ear from behind. I move around His half exposed slightly toned body. Placing my hand to His chest, I push Him down to the bed. My legs pin Him to the blue fabric of our bed, and I forcefully press my lips to his as my hands explore his familiar body. He lifts my long sleeved shirt off and I quickly connect our mouths again. Our tongues move in perfect sync, as they always do.

My hands skillfully unbutton His pants within seconds. I pull away from the dark haired boy to stand, and undress myself. Before I can get the chance though, He stands, and throws me down to the bed. Craig swiftly pulls down my pants and boxers simultaneously to reveal my length to him. He's only doing this 'cause He knows I don't like using lube, or condoms. I just prefer o-natural is all.

His mouth begins to work it's magic, though there's not too much 'show' going on, since he knows this isn't what I'm interested in. Craig's always been good at getting a job done in the most efficient, yet effective way possible. Haha, get it? Job? Blow job? Ha! Nice one, Kenny!

Once He's made my entire length nice and moist, He moves off of me. I pull His undone pants off, followed by my own. He lays Himself on the messy blue fabric and I crawl on top. I give Him a few of my fingers to suck, which he does in a slightly seductive manner. This boy makes me laugh. He's so cute, but, like, in a non-cute way and it's just… you get the point.

I pull my fingers from his mouth and he brings his legs to my shoulders allowing me access. After very little prep, which He's requested I do before every time, I slide into Him easily. Fuck, this never gets old. I push into him hard, and begin to thrust faster, and faster. Our moans cover the sound of flapping skin as I begin to pump his member.

My grip on his leg tightens as I reach climax. I thrust a few more times and attempt to hold the exhilaration a few seconds longer. Rather than continuing to pump Craig, who's yet to cum, I pull out of him and let his legs fall. I move my mouth to his dick and begin to fuck with him. I personally am only addicted to the actual entire feeling of an orgasm, but other people even Craig, do actually like being pleasured. My tongue swirls around His shaft and I lick tenderly for another moment before I need to swallow.

After a few moments of simply lying in bed, we reluctantly have to get up to brush our teeth and wash our face and all that shit.

"Good night, angel." I press my lips gently to his before we doze off, tangled in each others limbs.

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**A/N Remember what more Kenny means right? Sex XD**

**Haha I'm not gonna lie, I actually laughed when I reread the part that's like 'Titties!' Cause it just kinda seemed like a really… Kenny… thing... To do… heh…**

**ANYWAY, so how this is working from now on (this is just as much as a self motivation for me, as it is information for you, my readers) is that it's:**

**Tweek: 1,2,3,4,5,5.5**

**Kenny 6,7,8,9,10,10.5**

**Craig 11,12,13,14,15,15.5**

**The .5 sections are to separate major story climaxes, which will get more thrilling as the story continues… hopefully. **

**:OH! AND please review? Now I actually just want opinions please. Criticism, comments, anything? I don't expect many… just… some more? **


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N I remembered where I was going with this story, so here you go! Another chapter! :D**

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Chapter 7

"Hey, MOM," I address my boss just as Craig and I are leaving work.

"Yes, Kenneth?" I swear, she's the only person on this planet that uses my full first name.

"Would it be too much to ask for a bottle for a 60oz of vodka, and a 50oz of red sour puss?"

"Well, I'm gonna need to see some I.D., Kenneth."

"…Uh…" Well, I'm 19 today at 2:45! But that doesn't really count…

"Just kidding! $40 is fine."

"Awesome. Here," I hand her a few twenties from our tips. "I'll go grab it. Thanks, MOM."

"Oh, Kenneth," I stop to face the shorter woman. "Happy Birthday."

"Oh my gawd! It's your birthday, Blondie?" Candii claps her hands all excitedly just as she was passing by. She's our little platinum blonde who loves pink and has a magnificent set of fake breasts. She's a sweet girl.

"It is today." I send her a smile.

"Awe! We don't even work tonight!" She pouts out her glossy bottom lip.

"Well you could give me my gift now." I bend over a little and press my pointed index finger to my cheek. Candii happily pecks my cheek and giggles.

"Ken, we have to get going." Craig passes me my subtle black leather jacket. I say subtle as in it's not a douchie looking thing, it's just nice looking.

"Angel, grab a 60 of V for me." We enter the storage room that's beside the exit and grab our stash before heading home.

**~X~**

Craig and I enter our apartment at nearly sunrise, as usual. The television is off, which is odd. Tweek is usually up watching the news and reminding herself of all the bad in the world over and over again. Where the hell is she?

"Ken, come here!" Craig whispers loudly to me from the bedroom doorway. I peak in over His shoulder to see Her curled up in the middle of our bed.

"Awe! She's so cute!" I remark like an anxious fangirl. She really is precious.

After we're ready for bed, we slip under the covers on either side of Her. She still chooses to wear her old boys pajamas since they're comfy. Craig and I just wear pajama pants or boxers. I told Her once She doesn't need a shirt for bed either. I got a nice little slap to the face for that one.

We wrap our arms around her and make ourselves comfortable. Just as I'm about to doze off, He brushes my jaw line gently with his knuckles.

"Happy Birthday, Ken."

"Thanks, Angel."

**~X~**

I awake to movement in our bed. Damn, right in the middle of a dream! Tweek nearly successfully made it out of bed without waking us. Unfortunately, She is one of the clumsiest people I know. She fell off the bed and woke both Craig and I up.

"Ugh, you okay, Tweek?" Craig asks while rubbing his eyes awake.

"Sorry! I didn't mean to wake you guys up!" She scrambles to Her feet with a small blush on Her cheeks. So cute.

"Its fine, babe. Have a good day at school." I flop back down to our nice warm bed.

"Oh Jesus! I almost forgot!" I open my eyes to see her scurry to my side of the bed and jump onto me.

"Oof!"

"Happy Birthday, Kenny!"

"Thanks, Tweekers." She kisses my forehead before rushing out of the room to get back on Her schedule.

"Ugh, it's only 8:30. How does she do this?" Craig asks with his groggy voice, while pulling his covers up.

"I had a dream, Craig."

"Hm? What about?"

"Why I call you Angel."

"Oh, so you had a nightmare than?" I chuckle.

"It's not a nightmare! At least it ended pretty well."

"Hm. I'll see you in a few hours, Birthday Boy." Fair enough, we're going to have a late night tonight anyway.

As for my dream, it's really just a memory. It's a memory that plays over in my mind every chance it gets. And every time I dream it, it's not from my perspective. It's like I'm standing outside of my body and my imagination is filling in what I think probably happened.

Everything around me is on fire. There's a small, ragged beggar boy lying helpless on the floor. It's the middle of the night. The boy's Mother had probably fallen asleep with a cigarette in her hand. The boy's Father had left with Kevin, his brother, a few years before.

The soot filled boy is lying nearly unconscious on the floor in nothing but a pair of boxers. This wouldn't be the first time for him to die, but with his mother dead; it would be his last.

Suddenly, a boy kicks though the front door of the flaming house. He's a good friend on welfare who lived a few houses away. He isn't older than thirteen, this blue clad kid.

"KENNY! KENNY, WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?" The young teen's voice cracks as he calls out. The boy on the floor flinches and opens his mouth to speak, but he makes no sound; instead he begins to cough.

"KENNY! IS THAT YOU?" He pushes through the smoke and dodges a piece of falling shit ass ceiling. The boy in blue pajamas spots the young teen lying helpless on the burning floor. Without another word, the former hoists the latter boy up bridal style and carries him out of the cheap burning death trap that was once the helpless boy's home.

This is where it get's interesting. My first person point of view returns once we leave the house. Craig carried me all the way to the other side of the street and gave me his pajama top he was wearing. His face remains indifferent, but in the flashing lights of the fire trucks I can see his eyes are filled with worry and fear for my life.

"It'll be okay, Kenny. You can stay with me and yeah, it'll all be fine. I promise." He tells me as he holds me and I lay nearly unconscious on his lap.

**~X~**

I wake again to a soft kiss to my lips. My eyes flutter open to reveal Him above my face.

"Afternoon. Come on, we gotta go to class. I let you sleep in a bit."

"Awe, thank you!" I sit up to find my breakfast made on a tray at the end of our bed. "Craig, you didn't need to make me breakfast!"

"You know if I hadn't you'd be bummed out all day. Eat up." Mm, waffles, and bacon! Fuck yes! He's the best!

Craig has requested we never do anything big for his birthday, which passed a few months ago. However, he has made it a point to celebrate mine and Tweek's birthdays every year in special ways.

**~X~**

"Happy Birthday, dear Kenny. Happy Birthday to you!" My loves chime together as Craig sets down a small cake he made about an hour ago. He's so amazing. It's the one with the little rainbow chips, my favourite!

"Awe, thank you guys!" I blow out the little '19' candles on top.

"No problem, Ken. Anything for you." He slices the treat and serves it to Tweek and I at our kitchen's island.

"Tweek, I love how you wore the outfit I bought for you. She's in a pink very low V-neck t-shirt and a small miniskirt.

"You're welcome, Kenny." She mumbles and blushes. God, she makes me crazy.

"Are you coming to eat, Craigy?" I ask to His turned back. He's mixing enough drinks for us so we don't have to make them when we're drunk. I don't even know what the hell he's putting in that shit, all I know is it's gonna be STRONG.

"Hold on, princess." Craig returns to our island and places two dark red drinks beside Tweek and I. he lights up another smoke before taking a drink of his own concoction.

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**A/N** **da nex chapper will be up real soonz wit sum smex n stuffz… yeah…**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I didn't get very far, but the next chapter will! I promise!**

**Let me know what you think? **


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N the previous chapter was supposed to go up yesterday, but FF fucked out, so I just put these both up at he same time. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything but these words.

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Chapter 8

About five of His drinks later and I'm a little tipsy! Heh! Tweek is always so funny when She's drunk! She giggles, like, non-stop! And Craig laughs more too. I'm glad we're all happy drunks. That's another one of the reasons we've always been so good for each other.

"Tweek! Twee' com'ere!" We've all made our way to our bedroom. Somehow we've all managed to strip each other almost completely! Haha! MY lips are all chapped from makin' out! I remove Tweek's panties as Craig pulls down my boxers. Everything is, like, blurry!

"Hey! Hey, Angel! Why don' we, like, do 'er _together_?" I put extra emphasis on pronouncing together properly. I don't even know why! Woohoo!

"Wait, wait… wait…" Tweek uses her hands in a sorta 'slow it down, guys!' motion. "You're both gon' fuck me in the fron'?" My little blond lightweight slurs.

"Mhm!" I push her limp body to lay on the bed. Craig and I push Her legs to the sides as far as possible. Craig and I begin prepping her with our index fingers from both our hands. Jesus, that probably feels so weird! She moans in delight so be both move on to spreading her opening further. I begin to giggle for no reason.

"Whaz so funny, Ken?" Craig asks from beside me.

"Nothing, nothing! K, k, I got this." Both Craig and I begin to pull Her open slowly.

"AH! AH! STOP! NGH!" Tweek's back arches as She grips the bedding tightly. "K, k, go." We both continue while She grits her teeth and moans. She sounds more like she's enjoying this that enduring pain.

"Think tha's enough, Ken?" Craig asks me and I nod. Damn, girls like give birth outta that thing! Without allowing Her to close, Craig and I rub Her juices on our erect cocks. This is gonna be _sweet!_

We both move forward and enter together. Tweek moans as we go deeper and deeper together. She's lucky we're going this to Her front, rather than the back. At least this naturally opens wide! Craig and I start thrusting as the same time, while we hold Her legs. She screams or names as Her back arches to get us in further. Fuck, I gotta cum soon.

We all put our full effort into our actions until something amazing terrific happens. We _all _arrive together! Fucking A, that was amazing! God, I fucking love sex.

We're all so exhausted that just after Craig and I pull out of Tweek, He and I fall beside Her on the bed and we all fucking pass out.

**~X~**

Oh, my head. Fuck, what the hell did we do last night? I turn my head to the side only to see Tweek's smoking hot body KO'd and uncovered. Actually, we're all over the covers; naked. Ugh, what time is it? I glance over to the clock we've decided to place on the other side of the room so we can all see it no matter where we sleep. Fuck, It's 8:30! Tweek has a class in a half hour!

"SHIT!" I spring up. Well that was a bad idea. Ow, my head, ow.

"Ngh… Keep it down, Kenny! You're so loud!" Tweek shoos me with Her hand.

"Tweek, get up! You have a class in a half hour!" I shake Her shoulder closest to me. Her green eyes fly open in realization. Just as She tries to sit up she screams out in pain and pulls herself into a ball. The noise was loud enough to A) give me a splitting headache, and B) wake Craig. The tall boy jumps a little and falls out of bed all spazz like.

"Jesus Christ, man! It HURTS!" She holds Her crotch like a guy would after getting kicked in the balls.

"You'll be okay, Tweek. We'll give you a pain killer and then you can go to class." Craig deadpans from the floor, which He hasn't bothered to get up off of. Some party last night. I kinda wish I could remember it.

**~X~**

"Craig, I think it's about time we got a car." I tell my boyfriend, who's smoking, as we walk home from the bus stop after work.

"You know, Ken, I think you're right."

"You wanna start looking at some tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure. We can go before our classes, well, today."

"Sounds great. Actually," I open our door for him. "I saw this one on a commercial, it's called a Jukke and it looks pretty sick, dude."

"Alright, we can check it out. But you know, I kinda like the Kube."

"That one's pretty sick, too."

"Alright, we can discuss it with Tweek next time we see her awake."

"Is She in our bed again?" I ask as He steps into our bedroom.

"…No." I walk over to the couch. What the hell?

"Um, She's not here either…"

"Oh, hey guys." She opens the washroom door. Duh.

"Oh, hey Tweek. Say, while you're up, what do you think of us buying a new car?" I ask Her.

"Sounds like it's about fucking time." She rubs Her eyes as she passes us on the way to the sofa.

"Ok, than it's settled."

**~X~**

"Shit! Kenny, I have a doctors appointment at two today, could you bring me?" She asks sweetly from beside me on the sofa. Craig has been working for hours on a project that's due on Thursday, since He has no time to do it other than today. Tweek ended up without a class today, so we've been sitting together at home just enjoying each others company.

"You didn't mention it earlier… why?"

"I just remembered! I'm sorry."

"Of course I'll bring you. What time is it now?"

"Um… quarter after one."

"Oh. Well I guess we better get going."

"Tweek, do you think you would be allowed to get your license now?" I ask as we drive to the hospital in our lightly used, new-to-us Kube. This car is KICK ASS. …Just sayin'. No blind spots, man!

"Um, with all the medication I'm on? I don't think so." Now it's meds, before it was anxiety.

"Has there ever been a time in your life where you haven't been on meds?"

"Um… nope. There's always been something, I guess."

"Shitty."

"Tweek Tweak. I have an appointment today for 2:00." I stand beside Her as She signs in. we're just in time, too. Cool.

"Tweak?" A nurse calls to the waiting room about a half hour after we arrived. We stand and walk hand in hand to the patient room. A few moments later, a grey haired doctor dude enters with a folder.

"Hello again, Miss. Tweak." I take a seat far away from the paper covered bench. The doctor almost completely ignores me.

"Hey, doc."

"Are you here for a check-up on your situation?"

"Yeah. You remember I had my first period back at the beginning of February, right?"

"Yes, you were developing just fine."

"Yeah, and I got another one near the middle of March, which wasn't like on a real cycle or anything yet. Well, I haven't had another one since and it's the beginning of May. I'm, um, kinda worried, Doc." Shit. I had no idea she even had her period at all. God, I feel like such a terrible boyfriend right now!

"Well, have you had sexual relations since your second menstruation?"

"Heh, um, probably." She blushes a little and her head falls to look away from the man. The doctor glances over to me and looks me up and down. I give him a halfhearted wave and he shakes his head. He looks back to Tweek on the bench. What the hell was that about?

"But, we aren't really sure what happened. We were _right_ plastered…"

"Did any of you find any used condoms in the morning?"

"…No." The doctor nods and turns to grab something off his little table. "It was like one minute we were just sitting having drinks and then the next we're naked on the bed and it's 8:30 in the morning!" She laughs nervously.

"Well, I'll take a urine sample and well get you results shortly after." He hands Tweek little plastic container that he had grabbed a moment earlier. Ugh, my stomach doesn't feel too good.

"Ah, to be young again." He leans against the wall and looks to me. "Son, you can't be older than sixteen." The doctor tells me as soon as Tweek leaves. I smirk. A lot of people tell me that, actually.

"Actually, I'm nineteen."

"Huh. I was the same age when I became a daddy, too." Oh shit. All of a sudden the information hits me like a punch to the gut. "There's a trash can right beside you." I grab the can and my stomach flips. Bleh. Gross. "Well, our daughter turned out to be a beautiful girl with a family of her own now, and my wife and I had three children after her. It could work out for you too, son."

"What makes you so sure Tweek's pregnant?" I rub my mouth with my sleeve.

"She's developing very well into a woman, and her medication is sustaining her tremendously. And this isn't the first time it's happened." He chuckles. "I just hope you kids can sustain a child."

"Heh, me too."

"Here you go, Doc." Tweek hands the little container to him and he takes off. Once he leaves the room, I pull Tweek into my lap. I hug her body tight as she does the same to me.

"Kenny, did you ever want kids?"

"Well, I wouldn't be mad or anything if it happened, Tweek. I just wouldn't have ever gone out of my way to make it happen, you know?"

"Yeah."

"How about you?"

"Did I ever want kids?"

"Yeah."

"Kenny, I was a gay guy for the longest time with two boyfriends. I pictured us maybe getting a dog or something. I never really thought about kids."

"Fair enough. But how about now, with all your womanly hormones wanting to take care of something." I chuckle and She hits me lightly.

"I dunno. Well, when it happened the first time and I found out I had to get rid of it, to be honest, I think a little part of me died that day. It was sad. I kinda just never wanted that to happen again." I hold her tighter to my chest and rest my head on her soft golden head.

"It'll be okay, Tweekers." A few minutes later, the door opens and the doctor walks in with a piece of paper.

"The results are in, Miss. Tweek."

* * *

**A/N Oh! The cliffhangers! Don't they just kill ya? I might just keep you guys waiting a little while for the results ;) **

**Jeez, I hope the sex scene was okay… I wrote it whilst I was a little tipsy myself. Just buzzed enough so I knew how Kenny could possibly feel, but I could still see the keys! Anyone ever try typing while intoxicated? Bloody impossible.**

**Let me know what you think? I need your critiquing to become a better author! **

**Oh, if any of you have checked out my profile lately, I'm looking for a beta possibly. I just wanna try it out and see how it works out. Anyone interested? Send me an inbox message maybe? **


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

I clench Tweek's hands tight as my breathing hitches. Get a hold of yourself, McCormick!

"Congratulations, you're pregnant." Oh shit, I think my heart just stopped.

"Can I keep it this time?" Tweek asks unmoved by the news.

"Well, we'll run some tests on you, but I have a feeling it's a yes this time." I glance over to Tweek's face again. Thank God, she's smiling. She excitingly stands to follow the doctor out of the room.

"Are you coming, Kenny?" I jump out of the seat to follow them.

**~X~**

The ultra sound woman lays Tweek down in Her little hospital gown onto a bed. There's a machine on one side of us and a screen on the other.

"This is going to be a little cold." The kind Asian woman squirts jelly onto Tweek's pale feminine stomach.

"Ah, there it is." Dr. Cradd, as we found out his name is, says standing above the ultra sound woman.

"All seems to be going very well for your first trimester, Miss. Tweak." I can see a small smile on Her lips as She stairs at the screen. I squeeze Her hand and She looks at me. I grin at Her and Her smile grows before She looks back to the screen. She seems so much happier about this than I kinda expected.

"It's too early to tell anything big, like the sex, but it's developing perfectly. You get to keep it this time, Miss. Tweek." Holy shit, I'm gonna be a daddy. I look up to our little blob on screen and I can't help but smile like an idiot.

**~X~**

"What do you think Craig is gonna say?" I ask her in the car on the way back to the apartment.

"He's gonna tell us exactly what we need to hear right now, just like he always does." She tells me as She looks at the ultrasound photos.

"What do you think that is?"

"As usual, I have no fucking idea." She giggles and looks up to me. I take Her hand in mine as we wait in traffic.

**~X~**

"A kid? What are we gonna tell it? 'Oh you have two daddy's and a mommy that wasn't always a girl and lots of fucked up shit happened, so now BAM! Here you are thanks to alcohol and recklessness!'?" Craig shouts at us. I _never _expected Him to react like this.

"Craig, what the fuck is wrong with you?" I shout at Him. How could He be so cruel?

"Craig, this is all our fucking fault! Go out and have a fucking smoke, and then come back in and tell us what we need to hear, instead of being a flat out asshole!" Tweek yells, which shuts us both up. She has always frightened me when She's pissed. Scary shit, man.

Without saying another word, Craig flips us both off before storming out of the apartment, and slamming the door.

"He's just stressed." Tweek flops herself down on our sofa.

"I know. You want anything? Coffee?"

"I think coffee is bad for the baby. Actually, he gave me a book of all things bad for the baby."

"Smoking, alcohol, drugs; all the things we do." I state as I grab a carton of apple juice. "It's amazing nothing you've done in the past couple months has affected the baby."

"Yeah… But there's other stuff. Kenny, could you bring me a few ice cubes in a glass?" Ice cubes?

"Cravings?"

"Yes. Get used to it. Last time, all I wanted was peppermint. It was fucked." I take a seat beside her and hand her a glass of water with cubes, and my glass of apple juice.

"I gave you water too 'cause you're gonna need a lot more of it now."

"Do you know things about pregnant women?" Tweek asks before taking a sip.

"I do. I took all the chick classes in high school."

"Chick classes?"

"Yeah; family studies, home economics, child care; all that."

"Why?"

"There are no saws in home economics."

"…Okay." Suddenly our door opens and we both turn to see Craig kicking off his boots. He walks over to us and takes a deep breath before speaking.

"I love you two. " He states before taking a seat at the chair we have beside the television. "I shouldn't have shouted at you, I was just stressed."

"We know. It's okay, Craig." Tweek says softly.

"We're going to do this right. We'll take the classes, and we'll read books and shit, and we'll find a townhouse or something where we can raise our baby with more space. When we're out of university, we'll get a house, and it will all work out."

"I guess it's been a kinda unsaid mutual understanding that it doesn't matter who the _actual_ father is, right?" Tweek asks.

"Actually, I never even thought of that." I say truthfully.

"Tweek, if _I'm_ the 'actual' father, I still want Kenny there, obviously. It just has to go on the kid's birth certificate who the real father is."

"Right. But we're raising it to, like, call both of you it's daddies?"

"Yes." Craig and I chime.

"K."

"Can I see the pictures?" Craig asks, and Tweek passes Him the ultrasound photos. His eyes soften as He holds the small piece of paper. "Now, Tweek's gonna need healthier food than our 'Collage Diet', so we'll go grocery shopping tomorrow." Craig continues to list off what needs to be done.

"Are we gonna tell anyone?" Tweek asks out of nowhere.

"Like who? Your parents? They wanted you out as soon as you graduated, and we haven't spoken to them since you moved away cause your father threw all of your stuff on the front lawn ranting about how happy he was to get rid of you." It's true. They were fucking ecstatic to get rid of him, since they couldn't support him anymore.

"I guess we could tell my parents. They would probably want to know." Craig sighs from across us.

"Ruby would probably be happy. Girls like babies, right?" Tweek pulls her knees to her chest.

"Yes they do, Tweek. Do we want to tell Stan and Kyle?" I ask my partners. I know neither are big fans of them.

"If they ask, but you probably shouldn't go around bragging to everyone." Craig tells me.

"School is almost over. Our midterms are in a few weeks. We don't have to see anyone after that." Tweek states.

"Are we going back to South Park, then?" I ask Him.

"We need to find a place to stay that's better for the baby. We'll start looking as soon as school is done." We all agree. Well, our lives just got a little more interesting.

**~X~**

"Do you guys have everything? My parents know we're all staying for at least two weeks while we get this house situation figured out." Craig tells us as we pack up the car. We told the landlord we'd be moved out by the end of June.

"I'm all set." I close the back door, and walk over to get in on the other side. Tweek is in the front beside Craig, who will be driving for now.

"Same." Tweek closes the trunk and gets in beside Him. God, I never notice how long Her hair has gotten until I sit or stand behind Her. It's down to just past Her shoulders. Her style is just as messy as ever, but it looks _great_.

"Then, I guess we're off." Craig starts the Kube's engine and we take off to South Park. The only person who will miss us is MOM, since we're her best bartenders she's ever had; our skills are the only reason she's overlooked our ages.

* * *

**A/N Shit, there's only one and a half chapters left of Kenny. My plan isn't working out too well :( !**


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N I re-fell in love with this story. After re-reading it, I realized how much potential this actually has. It's not half bad! So, I'm going to work on this one for a while.**

* * *

Chapter 10

I know we've only been in the car for about fifteen minutes, but I'm tired. Tweek's already dozed off against the window in the front seat with Her arms wrapped around Her stomach.

"Are we there yet?" Instead of answering, Craig simply reaches behind him to flip me off.

"Right. So, anything you wanna talk about, Angel?" I ask before a large yawn takes over my body.

"Kenny, get some sleep and before you know it, we'll be back in my driveway."

"You sure?"

"I like driving in quiet. I can speed and don't have to worry about distractions."

"Fair enough." I stretch out my long limbs as much as I can in the backseat, and shut my eyes.

**~X~**

"We're here." He announces seconds after I register the car has been shut off. I look at the clock.

"Craig, we left Denver an hour and a half ago. It should take three to get here." He flips me off and exits the car. I get out to open the door for Tweek, who's still sleeping in the front seat.

"Tweek, we're here, babe." I glide my knuckles against Her soft cheek.

"Ngh. Oh, okay." She crawls from her seat out of the car. She's so adorable when She has no idea what the hell is going on.

"KENNY!" I suddenly hear from the direction of the Tucker's front door. I whip around to find Ruby running up to me.

"Hey!" She jumps up on me and throws her arms around my neck. I lift her up and swing her around once before putting her down again.

Ruby's always liked me way more than her own brother. Since I stayed at their house after my mom died and my house burnt down, I really grew on the Tuckers. Legally I should have stayed with my dad, but the government doesn't care too much about people as poor as us.

"I missed you, Kenny! And Tweek!" She wraps her arms around my girl. Quickly the young ginger realizes something is keeping distance between her and the blonde she's hugging.

"Huh?" Ruby steps back to look at Tweek. Her grey eyes grow big and her jaw drops at Tweek's transformed body.

"Holy shit! What happened to you?"

"Long story." Tweek shrugs and gives Ruby a half smile. I walk between the two girls and wrap my arms around their shoulders to lead them to the house.

"Alright, Craig and I will carry the stuff in. Don't worry about anything, Tweeky." I kiss my beautiful blonde's cheek and the two girls walk into the house; Ruby is still utterly confused.

"You know we're going to have to explain this to your family, right?" I ask Craig while we grab our packs from the trunk.

"Oh yeah. I thought about it all the way here."

"Yeah the whole hour and a half it took you." He flips me off before closing the trunk.

**~X~**

"So, she got a sex change from a pill to cure her anxiety and a.d.d. and because you three can't control yourselves, he… I mean, _she_ is pregnant?" Ruby repeats a summary of the story to make sure she understands. We've sat down Craig's parents and sister in the living room to get it done in one sitting.

"Yes." Craig responds.

"And now you need a place to stay so you three can find a home to raise this fucked up child in?" Mr. Tucker asks.

"Yes." Craig responds again.

"Whatever. Just as long as it comes out with ten fingers, ten toes, and only one set of genitals, I don't care." Mrs. Tucker tells us while getting up. Mr. Tucker nods and does the same, and the two leave the room.

"So now I, like, have a big sister to go shopping with?" Ruby asks Tweek.

"I'm not very good at shopping." Tweek tells her truthfully.

"But that top! It's so cute!" Ruby is referring to the single-long-sleeved aquamarine shirt with a darker green flower design on the bottom corner opposite to the sleeve.

"I do all of Tweek's shopping." I admit.

"Whatever. Come on, I'll do your hair and makeup!" Ruby grabs Tweek's hand and pulls Her off to the 15-year-old's room. That'll be interesting.

**~X~**

I would love to say Craig is cute when He sleeps, but that'd be a lie. His eyebrows furrow and His face twists into this 'forever irritated' expression. I slip onto the double bed He's been napping on for about an hour now. To think we shared this same bed for so many years.

"Angel," I whisper into His ear. I lift the bottom of His shirt and glide my fingers across His skin. Cute or not, He's still sexy.

"Hm?" His eyelids flutter open and His charcoal eyes glance to me. "Where's Tweek?" Of course She's His first concern.

"She's having a shower to get all that hairspray and makeup off." It sucks, She wouldn't even let us see.

"Hm. Alright." He clears His throat and places His hand on my arm that's across His belly. "What's up?"

"Angel, I was thinking about something." I shift my body closer to His and nuzzle my nose to His neck. "What do you think about raising the baby to call you 'Father' and me 'Daddy'?"

"And what brought you to think about this?"

"Well, 'Father' sounds more authoritative and serious, which you are, and 'Daddy' just sounds more fun. You know?" His eyebrows furrow.

"I can be fun." He deadpans. How convincing. "But that sounds fine, Ken." My hand travels from His stomach to His face. I turn his chin to face His to me and begin to kiss his dry lips. I honestly can't wait to father a kid with Him.

"Angel, I think we'll be great dads."

"I have to agree." He pecks my lips once more.

**~X~**

So, it's the end of June and we still haven't left the Tuckers. We're yet to find somewhere in Denver to live to raise the baby.

The Tucker's have been paying for all the expenses of taking classes and all of the prenatal care for the past month. I think we've thanked them a gazillion times for that one. MOM is pissed that we're taking this long, but really, there's only so much we can do.

"I think I found a place, but I'll know for sure by the time you guys get back." Craig tells me at the doorway as Tweek and I leave for a doctors appointment at Hell's Pass Hospital. Oh, how I spent many-a-nights at that place when I was young.

"Alright, Angel." I peck his lips and walk to the car where Tweek is waiting in the passengers seat. She's been wearing light makeup for the past few weeks, and dayum is She _stunning_. Just gorgeous this girl.

**~X~**

"So, how far along are you, Miss. Tweak?" The doctor asks as he takes a seat beside the bench Tweek is on.

"I'm fifteen weeks."

"Uh-huh. Shall we take a look?" Tweek nods and lays down on the bench. The doctor lifts Her shirt and begins to press down. "Fifteen weeks? You're sure?" I don't like his tone.

"Yeah, I'm sure." Tweek responds in a rather questioning tone.

"Huh." The dude writes something down in Her file. "I'm going to get you to get dressed in a gown and I'll bring you for an ultrasound, alright?"

"Is there something wrong?" Tweek asks just as concerned as I would have asked.

"You're a lot larger than women usually are at the beginning of their second trimester." Tweek changes and we exit the tiny room to follow the doctor to the ultrasound room. Shit, I'll die if there is anything wrong with this kid.

"I'll be right back Tweek, I just need a bathroom break." I tell Her just after the ultrasound technician finishes squirting jelly on Tweek's belly. I don't really need to go for a piss as much as I need to get out of this so I'll quit freaking out.

**A/N So, this story isn't going to end at chapter 15.5. I think I'll do another round with all three of them before I finish this. I really do like this. Like, it's messed up, sure, but lovely in it's imperfection… To me at least. **

**By the way, I don't feel like working on WGGTJLC&C right now, so this story will be updated frequently in the next few weeks. And if any of my readers ever want to know what story I'm working on, in my profile I update the section 'My Stories' often, so check it out. **

**NEXT CHAPTER! **


	12. Chapter 10 and a half

**A/N Holy shit have I learned a lot about pregnancy that I never thought I'd learn o_O …on account that I never want to get pregnant, but whatever. Good shit to know I guess.**

**So, this chapter's a slight mindfuck. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 10.5

Alright, calm down, McCormick. It's just a baby you're having with Tweek at 19. It's OKAY. Oh, and it might not even be yours, so calm the fuck down. Not that that even matters, since you're helping raise it anyway. Ok, go back inside that room and support your girlfriend.

"There we are. Would you like to know the sexes?" I hear just as I'm about to open the door.

Sex**_es_**?

"Sexes?" Tweek asks. I lean my forehead against the door.

"Of your twins." My eyes widen and I could swear my heart just stopped.

"What!" Tweek shouts. Yup, that's what I was thinking.

"You are aware you're having twins, right?" The technician asks, surprised.

"NO!" Tweek shouts again. I finally open the door and practically storm in.

"We're having twins? Are you fucking serious?" I ask the woman who's running the machine. Tweek looks like She's about to have a heart attack, which matches my expression.

"No one caught that before?" The brunette woman asks. We both shake our heads. "Hm. Well, would you like to know the sexes?"

"I guess that's pretty important now." Tweek says. I take my seat beside the bed. Tweek wraps Her fingers with mine and squeezes the life out of them.

"This one here is a girl." She's referring to the blob on the left side of Tweek's tummy. "And the other appears to be a boy." She tells us after moving the device around the right side of Tweek's belly.

"Are they okay?" Tweek asks, scarred.

"As far as I can tell there aren't any complications, Miss. Tweak." Both of us let out a sigh of relief.

"I'll go print some of the pictures I've taken. I'll let you get dressed while I'm out." The woman leaves the room after cleaning Tweek up.

"Fuck. What do you think Craig's going to say?" I ask Tweek as She pulls on Her shirt.

"I have no idea." She takes a seat back on the bed and I sit beside Her.

"Kenny?"

"Yeah, babe?'

"What do you think the chances are one of you isn't the father of both of them?"

"What, you mean like one's mine, and one's Craig's?"

"Yeah."

"Well considering the fact that this was even possible _at all_, I wouldn't doubt it by this point." Tweek nods and twiddles Her fingers. She's so fucking endearing.

"I hope it's that way." She admits in a whisper.

**~X~**

"Craig," I address Him after walking into His bedroom from the appointment.

"Hm? Oh, I think I've got a place." He glances from His computer for a moment.

"That's great! We need to talk." I tell him in one breath.

"Something wrong?" He looks over to Tweek and I.

"Not really wrong, but…" I pass him the ultrasound photos and we await his reaction.

* * *

**A/N Craig's turn next! I love writing Craig, but I miss writing from others points of view. **

**You know, It mildly concerns me that way more people alert this story than favourite it and review it. I like hearing what you guys have to say. Don't be shy! No one is going to judge you for liking this or anything. **


	13. Chapter 11

**A/N I got some awesome reviews and inboxes from the last chapter. THANKS GUY! :D I love my readers, and I love this story.**

**So here's more!**

**Enjoy! (It's Craig now, btw.)**

* * *

Chapter 11

This is awesome. Three floor, Three bedroom, two bathroom townhouse that's about a half hour commute to the university and twenty minutes from the bar. This'd be a hell of a score. Kenny and I have a shit ton of money saved up, so this shouldn't be a problem to pay for. I've done the calculations and with the amount that we make, the price of living for 3 adults and a kid, we have enough to re-furnish the place and for the mass amount of baby supplies.

Though it doesn't show, I'm truly ecstatic right now.

I hear Kenny and Tweek pull in to the driveway. Moments later, they're coming up the stairs. I'm just looking for the phone number to start making calls about this place.

"Craig," Kenny walks over to me at the computer desk.

"Hm? Oh, I think I've got a place." I tell him. Okay, most of what I think doesn't actually come out of my mouth. I look over to the two of them. I don't like the look in his eyes. He knows what he knows is going to bother me in some way.

"That's great! We need to talk." His tone isn't helping him either. He's my other half; I can read him like an open book.

"Something wrong?" I return to the tab with the house and focus my attention on my two blonds. They _both_ look extremely concerned.

"Not really wrong, but…" Kenny passes me a few pieces of small papers. It doesn't take me long to recognize they're ultrasound photos. But these don't look normal compared to what mine and my sisters look like.

"Spit it out, Kenny." I tell him as I analyze the papers.

"Angel, there's two of them." I turn and get on my feet in one swift motion.

"What the hell do you mean there are two of them?"

"Craig, we're having twins." Tweek tells me softly. I assume my expression is between unimpressed and scared shitless.

"Fuck."

"That was my reaction." Kenny and I have such similar reactions to everything, one would think we share a brain. What makes us different and both very necessary with each other is how we express the reactions.

"Are you okay, Tweek?" Why I'm asking is because she's the one who has to go through this, not us.

"Well, considering everything else that's happened, I think I'll survive. The parenting classes just keep telling me things like 'keep calm, carry on' and all that bull shit. Which I can now, thanks to the medication that got me into this mess in the first place." I love Tweek soooo much. Her attitude has always been the most attractive part of her to me.

"Here, I think I found a place, do you guys want to check it out?" I change the subject and usher the two over to my computer.

**~X~**

"Tweek, I'm coming in." I announce from outside my bathroom door. It's the bathroom right across the hall from my room. No one else has claimed it since Kenny I moved out. Ruby has her own, and my parent's do as well downstairs.

"Oh! Hey, Craig." She jumps when I open the door. She's in only her bra and panties and is fixing up her face to go out. Kenny and her are going to another parenting class in a few hours.

I walk up behind her, going to grab my toothbrush, but Tweek's body distracts me. No, not her tits or anything; her stomach. I wrap my arms around her from behind. She slips around in my arms to face me.

"They're kicking." Tweek looks down at her belly and back up to me with a blush. "They always kick whenever you and Kenny touch me." She admits shyly.

"God, you're soooo beautiful. I love you." I tell her bluntly, but I like to think there was emotion in those statements.

"But I'm all swollen and fat." She places her hands on her bump and frowns.

"You're pregnant with twins. Did you think you'd be a little bone rack for the next nine months?"

"I don't think I mentioned this to you, but you're smart so you've already probably considered this," Her arms slink around my neck as I hold her waist. "What do you think the chances are that one's your and one's Kenny's?" Her big green eyes with a light amount of purple eye shadow look up to me.

"The chances would be very slim, but I've considered it. I think that'd be interesting." I lean down and capture her glossed lips. I just hope they're healthy.

**~X~**

"So, we've got it? Great, when's the earliest we can move in? August 1st? Fantastic. Yeah, we can be there to pick up the paperwork and everything July 30th. K, thanks, bye."

"Who you talking to?" Kenny asks after entering my room and before closing my door.

"Landlord. Just got the house we were looking at." I stand and push in my seat with a satisfied grin.

"Really? That's awesome!" Kenny wraps his arms around my neck and pecks my lips.

"Yup. We'll leave here on the 29th and stay at a hotel overnight, fill out the paperwork the 30th, pack on the 31st, and move in on August 1st." I tell him excitedly. Well, as excited as I get. My voice actually fluctuated there I think. I know he just wants sex right now, but this is important shit.

"Sounds good, Angel." He leans his forehead to mine and stares at my lips. "Tweek's gone with Ruby and your mom to shop for more maternity wear; you know, the whole 18 week thing where she starts to really blow up like a balloon, and your dad's at work." He states, never breaking his gaze from my lips.

"Message received." I press our lips together and our tongues move together in each other's mouths. We've been doing this for five years now. _Five_. I smile at the thought. Holy shit, I love this boy.

"What's so funny?" He asks with his Cheshire cat smile.

"We've been together for five years. That's all."

"That's all? I think that's pretty impressive." He begins to kiss me again and moves his arms so one hand is on my neck, the other cupping my face.

Kenny's a big fan of readjusting the angle he's kissing from. I don't know why, I don't care, cause no matter what angle he's still fucking amazing. Today he's taking it slower than usual.

"Something on your mind?" I ask, mildly concerned, and move to suck on his neck.

"Just Tweek." I finish the hickie before I move to look back at his eyes.

"What're you thinking about, Kenny?" I tuck a few of my fingers into the rim of his pants and pull him over to the bed.

"To be honest, baby names." He falls on top of me and starts kissing me again. I often bite his lower lip. He _loves_ that shit. My hands travel up his shirt to feel his thin frame. He's toned, but a skinny bitch like him will always be thin.

"Alright, let's discuss this." In a fashion both of us can enjoy. "What about girl's names?" I ask while pulling off his shirt.

"Jessica. Alexis." He names off between breaths and eating my face off.

"I like Sarah." I tell him as he pulls off my shirt. His warm body moves against me as he grinds his hips lightly.

"Yeah, Sarah's nice." He agrees while fiddling with my belt buckle.

"And boy's names?" I ask as he pushes himself up to pull off his pants. I do the same.

"What do you like?" After pulling his jeans off, he pushes me back on the bed and straddles my hips.

"Lucas. Markus. James." I tell him as he sucks on my earlobe. Fuck, I love hen he does that.

"Those are boring, Angel." His hand moves south and massages between my legs.

"You got something better?" I slip my hands down the back of his boxers and pull him closer to me by his ass. He has a really nice ass, to be honest.

"I like Milo."

"Sarah and Milo?" I ask and raise a brow at him for a second. He presses his lips back to mine and hums in thought for a moment.

"I like Jeremy, too." He says while sliding his hand under my boxers and wrapping his warm fingers around me. He begins to pump gently.

"Sarah and Jeremy." I muse over the way the names roll off the tongue for a moment and Kenny pulls down my boxers. I sit up and push him back. I pull down his blue boxers and drop them on the floor and proceed to wrap my mouth around his length.

"I like it." Kenny tells me as I suck him off.

I pull off of him after a moment. "Do you wanna fuck, or do you just want head?" I ask casually, almost bored.

"Hm. Actually, if you do me, I'll do you, babe."

"Cool." I lean back over and swallow his whole length before bobbing my head. I hum as I move my tongue and mouth him for a few moments. Every once in a while I lick his tip gently. That drives him insane. My fingers tease the inside of his thighs and his balls all the while.

As much as I want to pleasure him, all I can think about when I do this is how much I want it to be over.

He bucks and thrusts his length further down my throat faster and fast until he forces my head down in a reflex to ensure I'll swallow. Sure, I almost choke when he does this, and he knows I'll swallow anyway, but it's just his reflexes.

"So we agree on Sarah and Jeremy?" I ask as we readjust positions.

"I think that sounds great." Kenny pushes me back and slides his mouth over me. his tongue works my sensitive spots and I can feel my heart pick up pace. He has never done this the same way twice. I love boring, but obviously with the partners I've chosen, boring was never really in the cards. Number one reason I like sex: I stop thinking and just DO. Which doesn't happen with anything else I ever do in life. Fucking awesome.

Kenny rubs my sack hard with one hand, while the other digs it's nails into the inside of my thigh. He continues to suck tenderly and use his tongue in ways I don't think any other person would ever bother to dream up. After several moments of gently bucking my hips into his mouth, I arrive and swallows, almost hungrily.

God, I really need a smoke right now. Quitting is RIDICULOUSLY hard. Like, to the point of torture, really. I've been doing it since I was eleven. But, it's for the kids, so.

"Kenny," I address him as we get dressed.

"Yeah, Angel?"

"I don't think we should tell the kids how we picked their names."

He smirks. "I have to agree."

* * *

**A/N Ou smexy Crenny and fluffy creek. Yay. I love those names, by the way. I've wanted use them forever in a story. I promise A LOT will be covered in the next 4.5 chapters. I just thought they needed a little smexy part her.e **


	14. Chapter 12

**A/N Sorry about the wait, my dear readers. I've been very very busy and all- I know excuses, excuses. Anyway, Here it is!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own shit.**

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Chapter 12

This happens every time my head hits the pillow. It's like laying down causes all my memories to fall back into place or something. Kenny right now is beside me, and Tweek is on the other edge of the bed. She said it gives her more space or something.

While laying on my back, I turn my head down to the blond boy beside me. He's hardly changed. Maybe a little more rough around the edges now with his often prickly face, but still just the same beggar orphan I took in all those years ago.

Kenny and I spent three years together in this bed. The first little while after his mom died was the hardest. I close my eyes and remember.

_My back is facing him. I know he's my best friend, but I'm just terrible in these situations. I'm not made for being all heartfelt and shit. But you saved him, Craig. Surly there's something you can go. You're not all ice. _

_He's sobbing, He thinks I'm asleep and I can't hear him. Of course he does, it's two in the morning. But how could I sleep when something in my chest keeps telling me I need to help him._

"_Kenny," I state without looking at him. He suddenly stops his sounds of crying. I roll over to face him and lean on my arm. _

"_Kenny, you shouldn't be crying." He wipes his tears with his bare arm. _

"_S-sorry. I know. Men don't cry." His shaky voice apologizes to me. God dammit._

"_That's not what I meant." He turns himself over and sits as I am. "You shouldn't feel as alone as you do." I can see his confused expression thanks to the light from my window._

"_What do you mean? I'm fine." _

"_Yeah, that's why you've cried every night since you got here two months ago."_

"_I w-wasn't crying." He tries to sound tough, but his voice cracks. Nice. _

"_Kenny, you're not alone. I'm right here." There is no other person on the planet I'd ever have this conversation with. _

_After what has felt like forever, I feel my hand gain a mind of it's own. It slips into Kenny's, and my fingers tie with his. We both lay down against the pillows and face each other, our hands still intertwined. We shift our bodies as close as possible, our faces only inches apart. I move my foot and a few moments later our legs are tangled as well. _

_We look at each other for a few moments. How cheesy. But I like his face, as creepy as that probably sounds. I _really_ like his face. _

_Finally, after, like, forever he tilts his head and presses his lips to mine. Instead of pulling away, I find myself kissing back and moving my lips with his as a shot of electricity passes through my entire body. He pulls away after a short moment._

"_I didn't know you were gay?" We say together. _

"_I'm not." We respond simultaneously, again._

"_I like both. I'm bi." He explains quickly. _

"_I_ _just like you." I'm so frank when I talk, god dammit. He smiles wide. _

"_You're an angel." He brushes my face lightly with his knuckles. _

"_If you say so." I smirk. He leans his forehead against mine and stares at my lips._

"_Craig," _

"_Hm?" _

"_Will you always be right next to me?" My heart flutters at his whisper. …No one's ever made it do that before. _

"_Yeah. Yeah I will be." He smiles and closes his eyes. _

"_Goodnight, Angel."_

I open my eyes and look over to him again. Fuck, I love that boy. I smile at the memory and manage to finally doze off.

**~X~**

Sigh. The fridge has the same stuff in it just like the last three times you checked, Craig. Fuck, It's so boring when Tweek and Kenny are gone to parenting classes. I should be reading the book they got me, but I don't feel like it right now. I'm hungry, and I'm a fucking amazing cook, but I don't feel like making anything. What a lazy motherfucker I am.

"Tucker, come here." My father calls to me from the living room as I'm walking back upstairs.

"Yeah?" I walk over to him and he puts down the paper he's reading.

"Take a seat, son." I do. "I want to talk to you about this whole situation and you being a father yourself soon." Oh shit. This'll be fun.

"Shoot." I tell him sounding almost completely uninterested.

"Listen to what they have to say." Well that was a lot deeper than I was expecting. "And know that they'll never actually know what they want, but let them try it anyway. Listen to what they have to say. Don't bother watching your language; they'll learn that shit as soon as they reach kindergarten anyway. And son,"

"Hm?"

"Just remember, you can't stop them from being themselves. They're going to do whatever they want, let them make they're mistakes, but just…" He stops to think for a moment. I lean up against the living room doorframe as I look around my old house. _So_ many memories.

"Just," My attention snaps back to him. "Never give up on them."

**~X~**

"Good morning, Angel." Kenny brushes his knuckles against my cheek. That never gets old. I open my eyes to a soft smile on his face and I stretch.

"Hey, Kenny."

"Time to get up! It's the big day!" He tells me as he crawls over me to get out of bed.

"You could have just gone around."

"Yeah, but it's so much more fun violating you." He winks at me as he leaves the room. Cheeky bastard.

"Is all your stuff packed, Craig?" My mother asks me as we all eat breakfast as a family, minus my dad who escaped to work early.

"Almost all of it. We have a few more loads of small bags, but after that we should be good."

"So where's all of the furniture and stuff from your house?" Ruby asks before taking another bite of her pancakes. I decided I'd make my family one last breakfast before we leave. They're much more fond of my cooking than they are of me.

"We had it delivered to the new place the day after we found it." Kenny tells them.

"Alright, ready to go finish up?" I ask Kenny and grab his empty plate.

"For sure."

"Take your time, Tweekers." I kiss her head as I walk by. She's in a long white shirt that has an elastic right under her breasts and above her bump. And Ruby's been getting her to wear little green bows in her hair often. She looks sooo amazing.

**~X~**

"Bye Kenny!" Ruby jumps and wraps her legs around Kenny's waist and he spins her around. I think that might be a little far, but whatever.

"So you're going to come here for Christmas time and have the babies here?" My mother asks me as we watch Ruby, Kenny, and Tweek say their goodbyes by the car.

"Yup."

"When are they do, again?"

"December 22nd."

"Hm. Craig,"

"Yeah, Mom?" I turn to face her.

"I know your priorities are to them, but make sure you take care of yourself, okay?"

"Yes, Mom." I give her a quick hug before getting into the car to go explore our new home.

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**A/N and there you have it! I'm not done yet, but I have the whole thing planned out! ...sort of...  
Comment, review, favourite, hate, complain, ignore, WHATEVER! **

**I love my readers anyway. **

**;) **


	15. Chapter 13

**A/N Shit. I just wrote an entire chapter as Kenny when it was supposed to be Craig. Oh well, I love it too much to change it. I goofed. As a reward, there will be an extra chapter! How does that sound? **

**I am in love with writing again and I hope this peaks your interest after like 2 years of starting it! I'm a university girl now, so hopefully my writing has improved! Now, without further ado, the new chapter! *throws glitter confetti***

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Chapter 13

"We're here." Craig announces unenthusiastically. My eyelids peak open before I yawn and stretch. Fucker only drove an hour and a half again plus a little time to find the place.

"God dammit, dude. How do you not get caught by any state trooper ever?" I ask rhetorically. Craig flips me off before hopping out of the car and making His way around to help Tweek out. What a gentleman.

A small silver car pulls up beside and an older guy with a lazy eye steps out. Should he even be driving? I wait by the side of the car with Tweek while Craig fills out all of the paperwork and the legal mumbo-jumbo-shit.

"It's a good neighbourhood for a family, don't you think, Kenny?" Tweek asks as Her dazzling green eyes dart around to take in all of the new surroundings.

"I think it's great, even if it's temporary." I place my hand on Her lower back and smile down to Her.

"Aright, you're all set. Just call me if you have any problems. I'll e-mail you a copy of the signed leases and get your payments from automatic withdrawal." I overhear the landlord telling Him.

"Thanks." Craig responds simply as the lazy-eye guy drops the keys into His palm.

**~X~**

The townhouse is defiantly bigger in the inside. It was recently re-done with light blue-grey walls all over, with a new, kitchen, and bathroom, and everything. There's the second level staircase almost immediately at the entrance, the kitchen is down the hall, which leads into the living room and back around. The upstairs has two bedrooms, a master and a guest, and one large bathroom. There is a basement, but it's only meant for storage, really. There's a tiny backyard but it hardly counts as anything. Once we get all our stuff in, it's gonna be bitchin'.

**~X~**

"They're kicking like crazy." Tweek tells me as I lay my chin gently on Her massive belly. My fingers trace lightly across Her bare sides. Her legs are over my shoulders as I lay in front of her on the bed; Her back os slouched against the wall and a few pillows. She is nothing less than divine perfection.

"I can feel them." I smile, which She returns. Her eyes are so unbelievably beautifully bright.

"Hey babe, and babe, and babes." Craig stodgily announces as He enters the new bedroom. "I made the parenting appointments, arranged to start work with MOM again; she needs us to go through some training with a few new menu items and machine things, our class schedules are all taken care of, and Tweek has multiple appointments booked and her arrangements for her delivery between December 18th and 23rd. Did I miss anything?"

"How about some relaxation, Angel." I say sarcastically. "Come here and join us!"

"Negatory, I've gotta make dinner." He scratches His unshaven chin before turning to head back out.

"Please, Craig." Tweek begs softly. Neither of us can resist Her when She does that. And Her fucking puppy-dog eyes. They melt Craig's icy heart every damn time.

"I guess I have a second." He mumbles, reluctantly. Tweek holds out Her arms to invite Him on our awesome new king-sized bed. Tweek pulls Him near and He pecks Her gorgeous lips. But, She pulls Him in for more. His hand wraps around Her slender shoulder and She kisses Him tenderly with Her arms wrapped around His neck. Well, this is hot.

"Thank you, Craig. You're wonderful." Tweek gives Him one last quick kiss before He is free to sit up beside Her. His face is crimson and it didn't take much for His pants to get a little _too_ tight. He shrugs in response, as though all He does for us is no big deal.

"Um, how does fried veggies and pasta sauce sound?" Craig asks as He attempts to regain His composure.

"Sounds awesome and full of healthy grossness. I mean goodness." I say jokingly I kiss Tweek's belly before changing my position and sliding between Her and Craig.

That scene was too illustrious to not take advantage of. Man, all these fancy words; I must be reading way too many books lately. My sexy pregnant girlfriend and smokin' other half just made out in front of me for like five minutes. My switch is officially turned on.

I grab Craig first, because if I don't, He'll just go make dinner and not join us. He can be a jerk like that sometimes. With my right hand, I wrap my fingers in His hair and pull His face to mine. Our lips meet and our tongues move together perfectly. My left hand moves behind Tweeks head and my fingers tangle in Her long, soft hair. I gently massage Her scalp before She dives in to kiss my neck gingerly and nip now and again. Her hand moves down to my crotch and She rubs hard against my jeans. Craig's lips move hungerly between grasping my lip in His teeth.

Craig pulls away momentarily to get down to the same amount of clothing Tweek and I have, which is underwear, basically. I advert my attention back to my alluring blonde. I remove Her bra before adjusting Her underneath myself. With Her pregnancy, Her magnificent boobs are even more voluptuous. And they're so fucking soft, just, ugh! I wrap my lips around Her nipple and suck gently, flicking my tongue every so often. Craig joins us back on the bed. He just stripped completely; this man doesn't fuck around. He presses close to Tweeks side before joining me in my actions. That's strange; he wouldn't normally do something like this. I mirror His position and stare at Him quizzically for a moment.

"I've, um, been wanting to try this for a while." He tells me, with his dry tone. Tweek looks like She's slipping into ecstasy right now; Her eyes are shut as She bites Her lip.

"Mmm, please, guys." She begs quietly. Craig and I simultaneously reach for Her crotch. Man, we really are like one mind in two bodies. We both slip off Her panties so our fingers have room to work together. Her lips are drenched, allowing us to slip our fingers in and out of Her easily. One of Her hands falls down to my back, and Her nails run up it sharply. I slip my finger in all the way and shake my hand in response. Craig follows suit and we enjoy a momentary moan.

"Ungh, ok please, guys, please." She begs, more loudly this time. Craig and I look to each other. I don't know why, but the sight of Him sucking on Her tit just drives me fucking crazy. I quickly move and encourage Tweek to flip to Her knees. Craig moves to lay down under her face to make out with Her more, but I can't wait any longer I rub my length against Her crotch before guiding it in. It doesn't go as far as it used to, but I think that's pretty understandable. While thrusting inside of Her at a constant pace, Craig makes eye contact with me. I guess it turned Him on because He's scrambling to His knees pretty quick. Tweek opens Her mouth to receive Craig and we both start moving at the same rate. I love this. My favourite part is when I can feel Her tighten around me when Craig pushes a little too hard.

I start to move a little slower and pull out a little. Tweek stops moaning altogether, and I know I've hit the sweet spot. Every time I feel Her get closer, She must bite Craig a bit too hard, because He buckles over slightly each time. Suddenly I feel a rush of warm liquid on me and push as deep as I can. Craig is like bent in half right now, the poor guy. Tweek lets go of Him finally and I don't think I've ever seen Him pull out faster. He quickly takes care of Himself onto Tweek's face and tongue, while I move rapidly to finish inside of Tweek.

"You ok, Angel?" I question when He stands form the bed.

"I'll recover." He deadpans.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"Don't worry about it." Craig pecks Tweek quickly on Her salty lips, and He does the same to me.

"I love you two." Tweek mumbles as She lies on the bed to have a nap.

**~X~**

Our classes start tomorrow evening after Craig and I work tonight. We've been back at work for a few weeks now, and everything is as perky and dayumn fine as always. The summer's over, so tourist season is as well, but that doesn't Stop Craig and I from getting awesome tips from all of the in the closet businessmen.

"You ok, Tweek?" I address Her as She archers Her back to stretch. Her hands move to Her boobs and She starts rubbing awkwardly. Hot.

"I'm just never comfortable these days." She admits.

"I bet I can help." I say moving behind her and cupping her massive boobs. I fuckin' love boobs. They're just so… fun.

"I still don't know how I'm doing to carry all my books around. I'm like a fucking walking whale." She places Her hands under Her tummy and makes Her way to the bedroom.

"We'll come pick you up after your Economics class and bring you home for lunch before bringing you back out for Poli Sci and DEVS. Alright? You'll only have one or two sets of books at all times. Promise." I tell Her as She tucks herself into bed.

"Alright, goodnight, you two." She tells Craig and I. We grab out wallets and keys before shutting the door and heading back to MOM and our luxurious sexy strippers.

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**A/N Well? Well? Have I still got it? I sure hope so ._. **

**Comment, review, hate, love, ignore, sploosh, whatevs. I'll start the next chapter up and do it right this time! Thanks for reading my valued and loyal readers!**


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